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【英诗中译】Orpheus Alone--Mark Strand

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发表于 2011-3-28 17:08:53 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

孤独的俄耳甫斯    马克•斯特兰德
这是一场难以言说的冒险:行走
在人们共知的最黑暗的冥河两岸,
穿过蒙头遮面的扰攘的人群,经蒸腾的石岩间,
栉比的棚屋,近乎倾圮于泥污;
来到令人敬畏的冥府,大理石构的庭院
空荡荡令他毛骨悚然,他坐定
于那深陷的静寂,述说
他所丧失的一切,他仍有的亏损,
接着,拧动竖琴全部音栓,说起爱妻的美目,
她的额头闪着金黄的夕辉,
她婀娜的颈项,她如削的双肩,每个部位
直至她迷人的臀部与小腿,话语娓娓道来,
仿佛从睡梦中托起,向上游漂浮
悖逆流水的意图,在此所有的被定罪者
与毫无意义的苦役,惊讶于他声音的美妙,
纷纷停手,即使疯狂的,披散头发的
复仇三女神,破例地流泪,满是煤烟的
空气因她也稍转清亮,这位失落的新娘
显身露出俏模样,光彩的容颜被人一睹为欢。
众所周知,这是值得传诵的第一首诗篇,
接下来的许多天,他到处枯坐于
亲朋好友的住处,头向后仰,双眼
闭合,想用意念召回爱妻,但发现
惟有他自身的存在,如此反复,陷入
丧妻的凄然,而后,决定性地
一言不发,起身游荡于岩穴之间
远离乡镇,他如此存活终至动摇
爱情的形象,他将世界归其原位
正如他所期待,他急切让其大小与形状
转成全新的语言,世间随之变样,
林木突然出现于不毛之地,
他在那儿诉求,举起枝条并扫掠之
嫩草滋生于拂过的阴影,
而顽石,此刻滞重已失,前来安置于彼,
而小动物们奇迹般躺在谷地
与玉米的田垅里,安眠。光的声音
从火的身体里出来,各种事物
从各自的深度升腾,前所未有地放光。
这是值得传诵的第二首诗篇,
毋需别人再提。第三首,最伟大的是
进入作为世间的世界,碍于无法言说,
一切渴望成为看不见的源头;它的到来
如同所有会消逝的事物,被赋于形象与声音
片刻间,如被霜覆盖或因袭某些运动
来自风的,然后消逝影踪;它在梦酣时莅临,
像一扇通向无极之门,而且被火焰紧围,
于清醒时再次驾到,时有时无地,
遥远而细微,它以林木之幻象显现,
经由川流的溪水, 不断地冲刷浅滩,
带着紫色的阴郁,带着某人的残肢,
散落于附近纷乱的腐叶间
带着他被割下的头颅逐浪翻滚,
破坏飘摇变幻的光团,起于漩涡卷起的
碎片与杂物;它以语言的形式到来
不为怜悯所触动,以奢华而模糊的诗行,
在此死亡再次降生,作为赠给世界的礼物,
于今后,没有自我的声音,也无望
超越行将发生的存在,未来该服丧啦。
(浓浓的绿意 译)
Orpheus Alone    Mark Strand
It was an adventure much could be made of: a walk
On the shores of the darkest known river,
Among the hooded, shoving crowds, by steaming rocks
And rows of ruined huts half buried in the muck;
Then to the great court with its marble yard
Whose emptiness gave him the creeps, and to sit there
In the sunken silence of the place and speak
Of what he had lost, what he still possessed of his loss,
And, then, pulling out all the stops, describing her eyes,
Her forehead where the golden light of evening spread,
The curve of her neck, the slope of her shoulders, everything
Down to her thighs and calves, letting the words come,
As if lifted from sleep, to drift upstream,
Against the water's will, where all the condemned
And pointless labor, stunned by his voice's cadence,
Would come to a halt, and even the crazed, disheveled
Furies, for the first time, would weep, and the soot-filled
Air would clear just enough for her, the lost bride,
To step through the image of herself and be seen in the light.
As everyone knows, this was the first great poem,
Which was followed by days of sitting around
In the houses of friends, with his head back, his eyes
Closed, trying to will her return, but finding
Only himself, again and again, trapped
In the chill of his loss, and, finally,
Without a word, taking off to wander the hills
Outside of town, where he stayed until he had shaken
The image of love and put in its place the world
As he wished it would be, urging its shape and measure
Into speech of such newness that the world was swayed,
And trees suddenly appeared in the bare place
Where he spoke and lifted their limbs and swept
The tender grass with the gowns of their shade,
And stones, weightless for once, came and set themselves there,
And small animals lay in the miraculous fields of grain
And aisles of corn, and slept. The voice of light
Had come forth from the body of fire, and each thing
Rose from its depths and shone as it never had.
And that was the second great poem,
Which no one recalls anymore. The third and greatest
Came into the world as the world, out of the unsayable,
Invisible source of all longing to be; it came
As things come that will perish, to be seen or heard
Awhile, like the coating of frost or the movement
Of wind, and then no more; it came in the middle of sleep
Like a door to the infinite, and, circled by flame,
Came again at the moment of waking, and, sometimes,
Remote and small, it came as a vision with trees
By a weaving stream, brushing the bank
With their violet shade, with somebody’s limbs
Scattered among the matted, mildewed leaves nearby,
With his severed head rolling under the waves,
Breaking the shifting columns of light into a swirl
Of slivers and flecks; it came in a language
Untouched by pity, in lines, lavish and dark,
Where death is reborn and sent into the world as a gift,
So the future, with no voice of its own, nor hope
Of ever becoming more than it will be, might mourn.
附上相关的希腊神话的传说:
        俄耳甫斯的父亲是太阳神兼音乐之神阿波罗,母亲是司管文艺的缪斯女神卡利俄帕。在他很小的时候,阿波罗把自己用的竖琴送给他。这把琴制作精巧,经俄耳甫斯一弹更是魅力神奇。
  俄耳甫斯遇到一位如花似玉的女子,叫欧律狄克。她生性活泼,最喜欢跟众仙女到山间田野嬉戏游玩。有一天,她正在原野上跑着,不料脚下踩着了一条毒蛇,毒蛇出其不意狠狠地咬了她一口,她哎哟一声便倒在了草地上,当同来的女伴赶来救护时,只见她已是毒气攻心而亡。
  俄耳甫斯听到噩耗后,决定舍身进入地府。地府是一个凄惨可怖的境界,那里黑暗冷酷、悲凉愁惨。俄耳甫斯顾不了许多,他一心要把妻子找回来!他的琴声打动了冥河上的艄公,驯服了守卫冥土大门的三头恶狗,连复仇女神们都被感动了。最后,他来到冥王与冥后的面前,请求把妻子还给他,并表示如若不然,他宁可死在这里,决不一个人回去!冥王冥后见此状,怜悯之情油然而生,便答应了他的请求,但提出一个条件:在他领着妻子走出地府之前决不能回头看她,否则他的妻子将永远不能回到人间。俄耳甫斯满心欢喜地谢了冥王冥后,然后领着心爱的妻子踏上重返人间的道路。欧律狄克的蛇伤还没有好,每走一步都痛苦地呻吟一声,俄耳甫斯却连看也不看她一眼。他们一前一后默默地走着,出了死关,穿过幽谷,渡过阴森的死河。他们就要离开昏暗的地府重返光明的乐土了! 这时,欧律狄克再也禁不住丈夫的冷遇,嘴里不高兴地嘟嚷起来,可怜的俄耳甫斯听到妻子的埋怨,忘却了冥王的叮嘱,他回过身来想拥抱妻子。突然,一切像梦幻一样消失,他的妻子又一次拉回死国,只给他留下两串晶莹的泪珠……
从此以后,俄耳甫斯对一切都失去了兴趣,孤身一人隐居在色雷斯的岩穴之中。后来,由于他不敬重酒神,被酒神手下的狂女杀害,将其尸体撕得粉碎抛到荒郊野外,他的头颅随着海水漂到了列斯波斯岛——这里便成为诗歌的故乡。
俄耳甫斯的母亲费尽周折将儿子的尸体收集起来,埋葬在奥林帕斯山麓——那里的夜莺比任何地方的鸟都唱得好听。阿波罗十分怀念他的儿子,便去请求天神宙斯,宙斯可怜俄耳甫斯死得悲惨,便把他父亲阿波罗送给他的七弦琴高高挂在空中,点缀苍莽的天穹,这便是天琴座的来历。

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 楼主| 发表于 2011-3-28 17:17:06 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

以诗歌的名义,诗人抒写了对人性的赞美,对世间人事的无奈,与对真善美的追索过程!

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发表于 2011-3-29 00:23:52 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

所有的诗人都期待缪斯的降临!我做沙发,慢慢欣赏哈~

点评

谢谢晚枫老师!马克•斯特兰德在本诗的结尾处写道:于今后,没有自我的声音,也无望 超越行将发生的存在,未来该服丧啦。诗人些许过于悲观。  发表于 2011-3-29 08:14
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发表于 2011-3-29 09:35:08 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

好长,呵呵,厉害!

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 楼主| 发表于 2011-3-29 11:08:34 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

翻译时也很难以取舍与表达,请诸位不吝批评与指教!
比较与选择:
much could be made of  可解的意义挺多(对冒险会出现各种反应:去地狱找死、重夫妻情义、大丈夫气概等);难以言说
hooded 戴头巾的;蒙头遮面的
shoving  你推我搡的;扰攘的
rows of  一排排;鳞次栉比的;
half buried  半掩埋的;倾圮的
the great court 庄严的宫廷;指令人敬畏的冥府
sunken  在地狱下的;深陷的
pulling out all the stops    全力以赴;弹动琴所有的音栓
pointless labor   干了也白干的苦役;因在阳世间的罪愆而受罚干毫无意义的苦役(犯)
Furies  复仇女神三姐妹--希腊神话中的形象
for the first time  第一次;破例地
In the chill of his loss 指丧妻的寒彻之感受;凄然
in the hills  在山间;出原神话故事衍生意:岩穴之间
weightless  没有重量;滞重已失
unsayable  不好说的;无法言说
be seen and heard  被看见与听到;赋于形象与声音
the infinite  无限;[数] 无穷大;无限的东西(如空间,时间); 无极
came as a vision  眼前出现的景象;幻象显现
the bank  (单数)浅滩
slivers and flecks  碎片与杂物
mourn  哀悼;忧伤;服丧
对诗中出现的部分词语作了垫字的处理,如美目her eyes、婀娜的颈项The curve of her neck、如削的双肩the slope of her shoulders、迷人的臀部与小腿 her thighs and calves。

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发表于 2011-3-29 11:39:57 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

这些处理实际上都是考虑“诗意”的词语修饰,绿意很用心,值得我学习。
我个人感觉,这种美化是必要的,但有时要把握好“度”,在考虑整篇的基础上,不要太多偏离大的色彩主调,就好。
另,我说的缪斯是那九个女神,不是这位Orpheus男士。这位Orpheus是弹 lyre的那位,呵呵。

点评

是的。  发表于 2011-3-29 12:41
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发表于 2011-3-29 11:43:38 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

改个格式,方便点:
这是一场难以言说的冒险:走在
人们共知的最黑暗的冥河两岸,
步入蒙头遮面的扰攘的人群,经蒸腾的火山,
栉比的棚屋,近乎倾圮于泥污;
It was an adventure much could be made of: a walk
On the shores of the darkest known river,
Among the hooded, shoving crowds, by steaming rocks
And rows of ruined huts half buried in the muck;
来到令人敬畏的冥府,大理石构的庭院
空荡荡令他毛骨悚然,他坐定
于那深陷的静寂,述说
他所丧失的一切,他仍有的亏损,
Then to the great court with its marble yard
Whose emptiness gave him the creeps, and to sit there
In the sunken silence of the place and speak
Of what he had lost, what he still possessed of his loss,
先看这八行哈~

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发表于 2011-3-29 12:01:36 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 雨荷风 于 2015-10-7 22:14 编辑

我先挑一个骨头,扰攘 是熙熙攘攘,热闹的,奔忙的,如 bustle and hustle . 但这里是说去往冥府的路上人很多,人们都穿那种带hood的袍子,(电影里见过),虽然人多,拥挤,但都不敢做声,是那种默默地拥挤地走。所以我认为“扰攘” 有点太“喧闹”了,不合适。
steaming rocks 是地狱之火的燃烧,使地下水蒸腾,看着像是石头冒烟(蒸汽),这个电影里也见过的。rocks 翻译成“火山” 有待推敲。

点评

谢谢指点!内力深厚啊!  发表于 2011-3-29 12:36
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