风中的叶子译(朋友学习翻译，请指正)：

晓曲

祈祷，或让爱也不老
文/晓曲
窗外的一对小鸟
相互在嬉戏欢叫
她们快乐的样子
好像在为我祈祷
看她们翻飞的舞蹈
轻轻地落在树梢
随风儿自在地逍遥
感觉不到老
我多想做一只小鸟
轻轻停在你情梢
与你的心儿一起跳
让爱也不老
风中的叶子译：
Pray, or keep love young
Writing by Xiao Qu
Outside the window , there are two birds
playing and singing with each other happily,
They look  so joyous
as if they are praying for me,
Watching they flying like dancers
landing on the treetop gently
and enjoying life freely with the winds,
I feel that everything remains youthful,
How I wish I could be one of the birds,
landing on the top of your heart kissingly
dancing with your heart
and keeping our love young.

周道模

总体不错了，似有可改之处：
writing by  ___ written by
there are two birds ____ two birds
watching they ___ watching them or their?
with the winds ___ in the wind?
I feel that everything remains  youthful___ they feel not old

浪子遐梦

The article/XiaoQu
Outside a window's pair of bird
is playing mutually happy singing,
They look  the joyful appearance
in prayed probably for me.
Look! they are  fluttering the dance
falls gently on the treetop.
Rambles comfortablely with the wind,
cannot feel old.
I  many want to make a bird
stop gently in your sentiment tree top,
Jump together with yours heart
Lets love not being old.
翻译得不到位，望不要见笑

晓曲

原帖由 浪子遐梦 于 2008-10-30 15:36:00 发表
The article/XiaoQu
Outside a window's pair of bird
is playing mutually happy singing,
They look  the joyful appearance
in prayed probably for me.
Look! they are  fluttering the dance
f......

嗯，人家就是需要指正哦:share:

海外逸士

make the poem as simple as possible:
two birds outside the window
are singing and playing with each other
        (can't say "singing with each other")
look, they are hovering like dancers
and swinging freely with the wind
how I wish I could be a bird
landing lightly on the bough of your love
leaping with the beat of your heart
(where no correction is made is ok)

晓曲

原帖由 浪子遐梦 于 2008-10-30 15:36:00 发表
The article/XiaoQu
Outside a window's pair of bird
is playing mutually happy singing,
They look  the joyful appearance
in prayed probably for me.
Look! they are  fluttering the dance
f......

握手兄弟！:share:

晓曲

原帖由 海外逸士 于 2008-10-31 5:47:00 发表
make the poem as simple as possible:
two birds outside the window
are singing and playing with each other
        (can't say "singing with each other")
look, they are hovering like ......

谢谢海外逸士兄！已转朋友参阅。:share:

安城

或许可用 a couple of birds 有配对之意

晓曲

原帖由 安城 于 2008-10-31 21:38:00 发表
或许可用 a couple of birds 有配对之意

谢谢安城把脉！:share:

沙果

欣赏！问候晓曲老师！