【新诗英译】轻衣社•浮云--沈鱼

浓浓的绿意

◎ 轻衣社•浮云    文 / 沈鱼

乌云还可下一场雨，浮云都是空虚
说与不说，都与价值无涉，正如春燕呢喃、梨花絮语
而我对风，答非所问，又有什么关系

浮云，你是理解我的，正如你理解乌有的香气
粉彩无形，并不由心，信手涂抹的并非都是心迹
你有所表达而我不可倾诉，就是这样
流水的心碎约等于明月的悲哀
而你的自闭症，约等于
我的忧郁学

浮云的本意只是路过，而我伸出手去
触摸的，却是你的鬓角，和轻衣
这多么媚俗，仿佛我掏空了肺腑却还做出一首断肠之诗
◎ Drifting Clouds•Light Garment Society    by Shen Yu   Tr Lush Greenness
Dark clouds may as well cause a rain, while drifting clouds consist of imaginary spaces.       
Talking or not is unconcerned about the values, just as spring swallows twitter and pear blossoms whisper.
But I give an irrelevant answer to wind gossips—a matter of no consequence.
Drifting clouds, you’d understand me, exactly as you do to fragrant nihility.
Pastel colours appear amorphous, but not heartfelt, and random daubing, not from the assured motives.
All you intend to express will not be what I incline to pour out. Thus
Flowing water’s broken heart approximately equals to the bright moon’s sadness
And your autistic disorder is approximately equal to
My melonchology.
Floating clouds desire to pass by, when I reach my hand out
Only to touch  strands of hair on your cheek, and your gossamer underwear--
A nearly vulgar act, as if I write a woeful verse by exerting myself inside out.

浓浓的绿意

译诗有点挑战性，又想妄作，自然要挨拍砖了。那就开始来吧，欢迎砸砖，让我再历练一次吧。谢谢啦！

无心剑

这首诗确实不好翻译。

自娱自乐

乌云还可下一场雨，浮云都是空虚
这里有个如何解读的问题。我可以这样来理解第一句。
If dark clouds, they'd bring a rain, but floating clouds gather nothing.

自娱自乐

说与不说，都与价值无涉
Talking or not has nothing to do with / has no relationship whatsoever with (so-called) the value

自娱自乐

your autistic disorder ----- I will make it simpler if I try it, "your autism' which means a kind of disorder...just a thought

无心剑

Let me give it a try just for fun...
乌云还可下一场雨，浮云都是空虚
说与不说，都与价值无涉，正如春燕呢喃、梨花絮语
而我对风，答非所问，又有什么关系
dark clouds might bring a rain, yet floating clouds could bring nothing
speaking or not isn't a matter of values, just as whispers of spring swallows and pear blossoms
if I answer what's not asked by the wind, then what does it matter anyway?

自娱自乐

Ok, I try my hand at it for fun...
乌云还可下一场雨，浮云都是空虚
说与不说，都与价值无涉，正如春燕呢喃、梨花絮语
而我对风，答非所问，又有什么关系
Dark clouds' d at least bring a rain, yet floating ones yield nothing.
A word or not doesn’t concern any value, as if swallow’s whisper or pear bloom’s chatter.
All the same, does it matter if my replies are incoherent to wind’s queries?

无心剑

All the same, does it matter if my replies are incoherent to wind’s queries?  译得好，我就想不到这样处理。

浓浓的绿意

我想请教一下，这样的理解可否？
诗人的表达与一场失去的恋爱有关，浮云则成为了逝去的相思的片段，“谁能坐此苦，龃龉于其中”。意中人因出现些许自闭的倾向，与“我”交流有点不畅，最终游移而去，“我”情动于中，臆想着“掏空了肺腑”，但愿于事有补呢。