【编辑】《望庐山五老峰》诗/李白 译/А.Е.吉多维奇

金沙文字

OK!
but:
Lu Mt---Mt.Lu Shan
Jiu River---River Jiu Jiang
4.I'll build a thatched cottage in the depths
Of pines and clouds

自娱自乐

原帖由 金沙文字 于 2009-7-14 10:35:00 发表
OK!
but:
Lu Mt---Mt.Lu Shan
Jiu River---River Jiu Jiang
4.I'll build a thatched cottage in the depths
Of pines and clouds

Good points!
Just say Lushan and Jiujing in English rendition, and then explain it in foot-note if it is necessary.
As for 4, yes, literally, it means exactly what you said, but if you write it in this way, I don't think it reads like a poem.
I would say 'tarry to cohabit with clouds and pines' ---does it sound better? :P

自娱自乐

by the way, jiujing river actually is part of the Yangtze river, so do we say Yangtze or Jiujiang river?

金沙文字

有理！
难题。Yangze更准确，然背叛的太多。折中路线吧，留点悬念..................

自娱自乐

原帖由 金沙文字 于 2009-7-14 12:44:00 发表
有理！
难题。Yangze更准确，然背叛的太多。折中路线吧，留点悬念..................

就是，就是，那就听你的了。
老金啊，你看我们这样子切磋算不算是‘学术’交流啊？呵呵呵:P