【古诗英译】《听弹琴》唐·刘长卿

自娱自乐

原帖由 薛湃 于 2009-12-11 5:23:00 发表
[quote] 原帖由 自娱自乐 于 2009-12-10 19:35:00 发表
however nowadays hardly ever I would be keen to play

Probably should be hardly ever would I...... [/quote]

Yep, you are right! Thanks for pointing out my bad!

自娱自乐

A clear tune comes from a zither of seven strings,
As if the sound into the pines the chill breeze brings.
An olden melody that I love more than I can say,
Alas, nowadays there's hardly anyone who'd play.

自娱自乐

Another version for fun...:P

A clear tune by a zither of seven strings,
As if the chill breeze in the pines rings.  
A piece of old music that I love so much,
Alas, now no one would bother to touch.

无心剑

自娱兄兴致高，给出几个好译本，无心剑佩服。

无心剑

薛君译本表意准确，音韵和谐，无心剑自叹弗如。

无心剑

A seven-stringed zither give out such a cool tone ,   
Striking me as if a piercing wind thro pines blows.   
Such a sweet ancient melody I cherish at most,
Alas, the nowaday musicians play it at least .

第一行：give out 应改为 gives out 或 emits
第二行： thro 应改为 thru或through

薛湃

原帖由 自娱自乐 于 2009-12-11 8:20:00 发表
Another version for fun...:P

A clear tune by a zither of seven strings,
As if the chill breeze in the pines rings.  
A piece of old music that I love so much,
Alas, now no one would bother to touch.

佳译！！
一、简洁精炼，与五言诗的风格吻合。
二、句句头韵，恐怕译成自娱君的招牌。
三、我翻译第3句是也想到过用love/like so much结尾，但苦于无法找到与之押韵的词语，只得弃之。自娱君妙才，不但解决了押韵问题，还押得如此自然、毫无因韵损意之病，在下十分佩服！

一点商榷：末句的no one（无人）似过于绝对，原文只是“（大）多（数人）不”。

薛湃

无心君，这本来就是你的风格啊！

薛湃

普敬君：zither（齐特琴）和lute（鲁特琴）都不是中国乐器，但都可以用来翻译“古琴”一词。
我选用lute只因为它的字母数和音节数都较zither少，可使译文更简洁。

海外逸士

聽彈琴  劉長卿
泠泠七弦上，靜听松風寒。古調雖自愛，今人多不彈。

Tinkling, tinkling, from the seven-stringed lyre;
I listen quietly as cold winds rustle pine trees.
Though I love the ancient tunes,
Yet most people nowadays don’t play.