【古诗英译】王维《山居秋暝》

海外逸士

new washed with dew 和 new washed by rain 結构上是否相同呢？
相同。副詞 + 分詞 + 介詞 + 名詞。

我評論一般只看寫作本身﹐不看作者。評論後或會去看一下。有次﹐我評論了林語
堂的。長江後浪推前浪。我與大家細緻深入的討論﹐希望能激起後浪。學習不能迷信名人﹐從而喪失信心﹐不能超越前人。

Rhapsodia

感谢金沙文字的详尽分析和评论，其中
“竹喧归浣女，【虚拟，非写实】
莲动下渔舟。【同上。对仗】” 一语中的。因为我也曾怀疑这个景象与前四句不是很一致，但又说不出什么道理。

自娱自乐君越译越开，已经达到一种境界了。呵呵，温馨提示，游离可以，别太远。诗人译诗往往会有这种趋势。
在此，我再出一版，其中的“竹喧归浣女，莲动下渔舟。”我做的改动比较大，而且变成了五音步，没能形成自始至终整齐的四音步抑扬格，有点遗憾。但能力不够的情况下，只能妥协：先达意，形式给意义让路吧。
第三版：

With hills cleansed and refreshed in rain ,                    
In cool dusk autumn comes to reign;                              
Thru pine trees the bright moonlight combs,           
Upon rocks crystal spring stream roams;                             
Bamboos rustle as it were washer maids,                             
And lotus sways were a dory invades .                              
Let go spring fragrance as it will,                             
A noble man, I would stay still.      

Rhapsodia

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Haha, you are right! I overlooked this possible misleading problem. Let me revise it again.

自娱自乐

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Thanks very much for your friendly reminder! I was trying to employ more different words to depict such a poem.

Invade, wade, evade, ----invade is better in my humble opinion. Congratulations to you!

Rhapsodia

Here is the revised version.

With hills cleansed and refreshed in rain ,                    
In cool dusk autumn comes to reign;                              
Through pine trees the bright moonlight combs,           
Upon rocks crystal spring stream roams;                             
Bamboos rustle as it were washer maids,                             
And lotus sways were a dory invades .                              
Let go spring fragrance in its way,                             
A noble man, I would still stay.      

Rhapsodia

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I did use "wade" before in another translation: 《褰裳》
子惠思我,褰裳涉溱。
Should me thou love and seek
Uplift thy robe and wade the creek

Oops, don't start this again~   

自娱自乐

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Bamboos rustle as it were washer maids,                             
And lotus sways were a dory invades .      

-----------------------------
如果按金沙的解读去翻的话，那么我斗胆认为 sways 和 invades 搭配不如 （lotus） eschew / evade （as a dory invades）, 因为诗人很可能将自己比为 lotus, ---咱惹不起，还能躲不起？远离那些 politics, especially the dirty ones...你来了，俺就走。

Rhapsodia

With hills cleansed and refreshed in rain ,                    
In cool dusk autumn comes to reign;                              
Through pine trees the bright moonlight combs,           
Upon rocks crystal spring stream roams;                             
Bamboos rustle as it were washer maids,                             
And lotus eschews as a dory invades .              （多一个音节，但as a可以做轻化变音处理，成为一个音节，格律诗歌可以的哈～）               
Let go spring fragrance in its way,                             
A noble man, I would still stay.     

Rhapsodia

回自娱自乐君：总觉着 skiff 是用来消遣的，玩玩乐乐的，dory 打渔的。

自娱自乐

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he term skiff is a type of small boat.
The word is related to ship and has a complicated etymology: "skiff" comes from the Middle English skif, which derives from the Old French esquif, which in turn derives from the Old Italian schifo, which is itself of Germanic origin (German Schiff). "Ship" comes from the Old English "scip", which has the same Germanic predecessor.
In American usage, the term is used to apply to small sea-going fishing boats. It is referred to historically in literature in Moby-Dick by Herman Melville[1] and The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway.[2] The skiff could be powered by sails as well as oars. One usage of skiff is to refer to a typically small flat-bottomed open boat with a pointed bow and a flat stern originally developed as an inexpensive and easy to build boat for use by inshore fishermen. Originally designed to be powered by rowing, their form has evolved so that they are efficiently powered by outboard motors. The design is still in common use today for both work and pleasure craft. They can be made of wood or other materials.
The Thames skiff is a round-bottom clinker-built rowing boat that is still very common on the River Thames and other rivers in England. It features in Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K. Jerome,[3] the book about a journey up the Thames. During the year, skiffing regattas are held in various river-side towns in England—the major event being the Skiff Championships Regatta at Henley.
The term skiff is also used to refer to a high performance sailing dinghy, one that usually features an asymmetrical spinnaker and requires that the crew use a trapeze to help balance the boat. Examples include: Cherub Skiff, 12ft Skiff, International 14 (14 ft skiff), 16ft Skiff, 18ft Skiff, 29er, 29erXX, 49er and Musto Performance Skiff.
The SKUD 18 was a 2-person keelboat based on the skiff universal design,[4] which made its debut in the 2008 Paralympic Games. The SKUD's 2008 class rules required disabled sailors to be secured to their centerline seats, the boat balanced by its lead-assisted keel.[5] Julian Bethwaite, who also designed the Olympic-class 49er skiff as well as the 29er and 29erXX, shares credit with Access Dinghy designer Chris Mitchell for design of the Paralympic-class SKUD 18.
There is a Central American/Mexican version of a skiff, generally called a panga.